Parents worry about their children no matter how grown are they, and there is no way to stop the worry of the parents. They worry about children’s relationships, finance and physical health.
A recent study concerning adult children’s parents was performed by Amber J. Seidel, who questioned 186 families and, found out that parents still lose sleep even if the children are already grown. However, the researcher Amber J.Seidel wasn’t shocked at all.
She says that the society is focused on families with younger children, but her interest is how we socialized as a family into adulthood. In the study published in The Gerontologist, all of this was detailed.
For stress a scale from 1 to 5 was used, where five represents the high stress and one represents no stress. Also, the parents were measured for hours of sleep. The surveys showed that moms slept 6.66 hours per night, while dads slept more 6.69 hours. Then the surveys were compared.
A loss of sleep was reported by the fathers while they supported their adult child
When the mothers physically performed the support, the father’s sleep wasn’t affected. However, the mothers lost sleep when they both performed the tasks.
Fathers were exhausted while supporting the adult children. The fathers were physically exhausted when their adult children needed their financial and emotional support. Fathers also found the daily activities exhausting.
The mothers were those who were exhausted with worry. Even if the fathers were the ones providing support, the mothers worried about their adult children. When the mothers performed the support, the fathers did not lose sleep. It looks like fathers don’t worry too much when the children are grown, or maybe the parents don’t talk about children’s distress. This can make fathers unaware and rest easy.
According to the research, the parents are more involved with their children’s lives later in the life of the child. The finding says that there are ‘’helicopter parents ’’ , type of parents who are hyperaware of the discomfort of their children. The argument for ‘’landing pad’’ is also supported by the finding.
Using smartphones provides a constant communication between families. Also, the parents have rights into the adult child’s life whether the like it or not. Moms can lose sleep if they are exposed to stresses.
Publicity of an adult children’s life can be stressful, parents may be inspired to give support. If a father saw her adult child spending time on social media, then he is ready to perform a support. This causes fathers to lose their sleep.
Luckily, there are methods to cope with the adult child’s constant stress. The stress has a complex and special function in human psychology, and after all, the stress is healthy, normal and it can’t be avoid. Unhealthy can be the way we respond to stress.
Amber J. Seidel insists that parents of grown children should analyze the type of support that they offer.
Do you control your child? Do you offer your unconditional support while letting your child live their life? Do you allow your child lazy or destructive behaviors?
Several supports are actually unhealthy
Don’t allow negative behaviors and trust your child enough to let them live a life they want. If they seek advice or they get into trouble give them support. This can reduce the parent’s burden. Forgive yourself and remember that, no matter the age, worrying about the child is normal. The following steps can help you to reduce the stress of an adult child. By living healthy and life without stress is the best way to help your children. You should stand on a solid ground everytime they need your support.
EXERCISE DURING THE WEEK AND EAT WELL
It’s proven that healthy nutrition and fitness reduce stress. This will help you live longer and that means that you will be able to provide support to your children as well as to your grandchildren.
REDUCE ALCOHOL, CAFFEINE AND DRUGS
It has been proven that these substances increase the stress. Try to eliminate your intake or to reduce it.
VISIT A THERAPIST OR TALK TO A FRIEND
Remember that you are not alone! Talk to people who had the same experiences as yours. You can also visit a therapist who will help you to cope with the problems. This will help you reduce the stress.
FIND TIME FOR YOURSELF
Work on improving yourself, and do things what you like. This is not selfish, and will make you stronger when the others need your help.
INFORM LOT OF PEOPLE
You can help other families by Informing through social media about this unique study and ways to reduce stress.
Spread this article if you know any parents that could benefit from it.